Patience Truly is a Virtue

I think one of the hardest lessons that we can learn today is to be content with truly being yourself. In the end, all we can do is give our all, and have true passions and hope that someone can see what we have to offer. This occurred to me today while continuing my job search. It's hard to get myself to sit down and keep applying when all the work and effort that I put into each application seems to be at no benefit. 99.999% of the time, you don't even hear from anyone. That desperate call or email to follow-up with the status of your application simply leads to grumbles and annoyances and the dreaded "We said we would notify you if we see it fit." Which leaves me to think, am I really not good enough for anyone? In the end, can't we all learn to be the best and grow, but how am I to learn and grow if no one will give me the chance? After all is said and done, I've learned that there really is no sound advice. We can only do what we are capable of doing and hope that someone will see that spark within us. If I truly put myself into each application and am truly genuine about who I am and how hard I'm willing to work, then someday, someone will recognize that. I don't want to jump the gun, but today my enthusiasm was recognized and this may not be a full step forward, but this is definitely a baby step that brings me to the conclusion that I'm on the right track. I can honestly say I do work at my full potential. Even in a position I despise, I do my best to deliver. All I have to do is simply be myself and be proud of who I am and my work and doors will open. They may be feet, miles, countries away, but somewhere out there I know there's an door with an opportunity waiting for me and small reminders like today let me know it's approaching.

One year older, another year to be gay.

Today I was feeling really stifled in my apt and really just wanted to get out. Just before I left, a good friend chatted me on gmail and sent me a link to a video that they said reminded me of this blog. I kind of put it aside and said my thanks and hit the road.

It's my birthday tomorrow and for some reason, I always get this anxious and apprehensive feeling around my birthday so I wanted to take an afternoon and evening to myself. There's something about my birthday that makes me reflect on everything one could possibly reflect on in terms of myself. I decided to try this placed called Berlin Currywurst (which was absolutely DIVINE btw) I read about on this website all about food in LA and then wanted to attempt to apply to different job openings at a coffee shop nearby. As I sat there, unproductive, I went back to the link my friend sent to me and decided to watch it. It sent chills down my spine how everything this man was speaking about and the ideas he was putting forth were exactly the root of my original ideas for this blog. As I started straying away from my blog and took a hiatus I forget about my original motive with starting this blog, to find something I'm happy about and to live a happier life. This video truly inspired me to continue with that attitude. He talked about the three A's to live an awesome life: Attitude, Awareness, and Authenticity. He talked about having the attitude to appreciate the little things in life. To choose to move on through difficult times and to look towards the future instead of dwelling in the present. Next, having the awareness of a three-year old. To act as if you're experiencing everything for the first time, that life is wonderful and inspiring. Lastly, to live authentically- something I struggled with for a long time and still do- to live as yourself, be true to yourself, and be happy with yourself. What a better way to start of my 23rd year with the mindset that I want to truly savor each day. And so now I sit here. Content. I'm looking around this coffee shop and everyone is smiling and laughing (I'm not joking btw) and think to myself, I have plenty of reason to smile as well. I may not have accomplished all I wanted to accomplish when I was 22, but today, I still had delicious German sausage (& freshly fried french fries!!), was asked by the cashier how my week was with a sense of sincerity (not to mention a slightly attractive one), and placed a real cube of sugar (I thought this was so cute!) into my coffee. Today was a good day. As I turn 23 in a little over an hour, I can't help but think, here's to another truly gay year.

Wanna check out the 3 A's for Awesome!

Inspiration for this blog

NEW DIRECTIONS

       After taking a mini hiatus from the blog world, it dawned on me that I was approaching this blog all wrong. My original premise was to find something I'm happy about everyday and blog about that. The key word here is "find". In order to find something, you have to stop and look for it right? That was the problem. If I originally started this blog in order to maintain happiness and to find those moments in daily life, being content and drifting along isn't the way to go. I found myself, sitting there, reflecting on my day and forcing myself to spit out an entry. So, what do you always do when things don't end up going as planned? You make changes and roll with it! I'm not gonna force myself to spew out entry after entry, because let's face it, there's not always enough time in the day. Plus, I should be out making an effort to do what I love. If being an International Development Studies graduate has taught me anything, it's taught me that when you're not content with the world around you to get out there and do something about it. So if I'm discontent with the working life, why not take more action to do things I love? I was originally on this mini-vacation with my blog because I was too busy assembling my very own clock, painting an ode to my time in Spain, and catching up with old friends. Just as I should be doing, I was going back to things I once had passion for and enjoyed. So, from here on out, I'll blog when I'm inspired to as I take active steps in my life! Whether I'm gay over bursts of creativity, delicious food, or family & friends, this blog is all about everything that makes me happy!

NICE PEOPLE

As we run our busy lives, it's often easy to brush off the little inconveniences when we know that being passive won't directly affect us. Sometimes though, little things come up that make you realize this isn't always the case. After it dawned on me that my W2 form for my job working at UCLA was most likely sent to my old apartment, I finally got around to calling so that I can track it down. Sure enough, it was in fact sent there. I was then told that I could only get it sent to my present address once my W2 was returned to their office by someone. As the lady put me on hold to check if someone did return it, I thought, oh great, what college student would even care to notice it was someone's W2 form and go through the trouble of having it returned to sender? I'm sure they get other people's mail all the time and set it aside. I mean, in all honesty, I wouldn't have gotten around to that. About ready to go over other options or plan my trek down to my old apartment, the receptionist finally returned. "Yep, someone went ahead and returned it to us, so we'll have it at our office for you to come pick up!" I guess I underestimate people sometimes. Thank you. 

VITALITY

     When you work a 9 to 5 job, it's easy to get into that mindset that everyday is the same routine and life becomes so mundane. It's time like these where I find myself not really caring about how I dress at work. When I'm in the office, I envision all these things I wanna accomplish, but once I get through a nine-hour work day, I suddenly have no more motivation and energy to do so. Life becomes one big blur. This blog actually started as one of my many inspirations that my mind comes across at work one day. The only difference this time is that it damn well came true! Why? Because I got myself over that slump and gathered enough motivation to do so. This morning, for the first time in literally months, I actually showered before work and arrived feeling fresh and put together. It's nice to take pride in yourself on a daily basis. In my opinion, taking time to make yourself presentable on a daily basis is a form of showing you're ready to take on the day. It shows a sense of vitality. It all starts with those first few minutes after waking up. Sure, today wasn't the most exciting day of my life, but it's still a new day and it's good to remind myself not to lose that life within me.

THOUGHTS ON DRIVING

Today, approaching a red light on a busy street, I realized that if I pulled up to the car in front of me, I would've blocked the way for a woman trying to make a left turn into a driveway. I gave her enough room to pull in before proceeding. I like to be nice on the roads when I can. Who said you have to be an aggressive driver to make it in LA? Thinking about it, I've never even used my horn on my mom's car since I've been using it since last summer. I think I'd like to keep it that way!

FOODGASMS

**New~*FaBuLoUs*~ header courtesy of Peter Ngaou

     Everyone who knows me knows that food can sometimes bring me weak to my knees. Food is my drug. Give me basket of fries and I'll be transported to a state of eternal bliss until I'm reminded of all the calories & fat I just inhaled. Yes, I literally inhale my food. I've lost track of how many times I've burned my tongue from impatiently taking my first bite out of my fresh-off-the-stove meals. Yes, I know I should work on slowing down and really taking my time to let the different flavors overtake my taste buds with culinary delight. Well, today, I decided to do just that. I took a nice stroll down to the intersection of Food Lane and Delicious Blvd and let me tell you the scenery was beautiful beyond words.

I was at Lemonade today in Venice and was intrigued by all the different ingredients that they combine in their dishes. Many times if you were given a list of different ingredients, you wouldn't think to combine some of the food items that they do. In the end, they all complement each other in perfect harmony. Let's start off with the light blend of chicken breast cubes tossed with butternut squash, chives, grapes, and sprinkled with slivered toasted almonds. I take a bite into the juicy chicken when, low and behold, the crunch of that almond gives me that edge I like, only to be brought back down to earth with a delightful finish thanks to mr. grape. If that wasn't enough, I move on to the next treat: Israeli couscous tossed with wild mushrooms. Only this couscous is not just Israeli- he's mixed. He's got some Italian in him. Joined in the mix is a dash of Parmesan cheese & Italian parsley doused in lemon truffle. The lemon truffle gives you a nice kick, but it's ok, because I was then pampered by the next one. In the next dish, slivers of watermelon radish soaked in sesame oil joined with seared ahi tuna almost melted in my mouth. If it wasn't for the snap peas to give me something to cling on to, I might have drowned! At last, my meal wouldn't have been complete without the golden, scrumptious bundle of cauliflower coated in curry with some golden raisins and almonds once again added to the mix, bringing me back full circle. At the end of this journey at the corner of Food Lane and Delicious Blvd was an airport and my taste buds just boarded first class on Succulent Airlines. The destination? A place where all foods can live in perfect harmony. Where foods from all different parts of the world, shapes, sizes, and colors can all frolic and play together in my mouth. Grapes can mingle with squash- raisins can shake hands with cauliflower- and who said almonds can't be on the side with meat-eaters and vegetarians alike? Together, differences aside, they all somehow work. And it's beautiful. Maybe we could all learn from this.